And while I spent the weekend browsing Instagram-meets-Grindr dating app Lavendr with my homofabulous homies over happy hour and dancing at a rooftop party til it got shut down by the police, my friend was onto wholesome activities like visiting another friend and her newborn. “Here’s Andrew Roland,” she texted a photo, “right now he has a little bit of baby acne.”

BABY ACNE?! Apparently there is such a thing and most apparently I’m the only person who’s never heard of it. I’m sorry, baby vocabulary is not part of my vernacular.  Well Baby Andrew, welcome to the world, my tiny friend. Acne happens, life’s a bitch, and another day passes that you drift a little further apart from friends that you used to know.


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